I am supported financially.

My husband works hard to provide.

My husband does what he feels is enough.

He sacrifices.

Question?

if God knows everything... including your future and what you are about to do, then how can there be free will? If God is omniscient then nothing can exist out of his consciousness. I mean think about it. how can you make a decision that God doesn't know about? and then he'll be like "wow that really Surprised me"

No way. It just doesn't make sense. The only way one can truly have free will is if God's knowledge only exists in the present tense. He can assume what you will do. Because if he does know your future than every step you take or butt you scratch has already been decided upon by Him.

Does that make sense at all?

I watched that movie "Legends of the Fall'

It was the best movie ever made and the saddest. I literally cried for 2 hours afterwards. and the movie itself was like 3 hours long. So thats a total of 5 hours of my life spent on overwhelming sad emotion haha. Nonetheless it rocked.

Sometimes i wish i were like Brad Pitt's character. Free and wild. Able to let go and melt into the environment. You live in an equilibrium with nature and 'God' and his fury and his mercy, his nature and his absense.

Its kind of like the humanism. They treasure humans as simply an animal. No sins or repressed desires, just basic animal instincts::: go for it.

Emotions

I swing from place to place
with no more attention
from slavery to space.

A fire thats squelched
in time will repeat
and love that was hot
is too great a feat.

Nothing will go my way
today.
I hold on to happiness'
wings and pray.

Harder and harder to laugh
its seems.
and now all colorless
even in dreams.