Monday, May 04, 2015

Story of my Life

I remember there was a time
When I was willing to throw it all away for you---
For someone whom I loved, 
But for someone who played me as a fool.
I was standing on the edge
Not so much ready to jump,
But to fall
For you.
Lived and died for you
Woke up and thought of you
Fell asleep and dreamt of you
Was ready to give it up for you
Thought I lived for you
But I was tricked by you...
What a fool
I was.

Took time to get over you
Not the same as forgive you
Not the same as fall out of love for you
But to move on from you
Moved far away
And stayed away
And strayed from faith
Then made my way back again
Had to suffer and repent again
and again
And again.
Had to find Christ when I was broken
Had to rebuilt the trust I had forgotten
Had to ask God for a new heart that was open
To seeing the goodness that I had forsaken.

I was and remain a fool.
A fool who has made mistakes
Who loved whom she should have hated
Who trusted when she should have waited
Who felt real things but who spent her time faking it. 

This is the story of my life. 

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