wowzers

anyone who has really spoken to me lately knows that i'm totally stressing out with some problems that i've been going through. and no i won't disclose them, but GOD i wish that someone would just TELL ME what to do and then he/she has to do it. i hate the initiative that i have to put into it. i know that sounds completely anti-proactive but sometimes problems just seem too big to ever be handled by the person it is affecting... does that make any sense at all? i just want to remove myself from my body and let it sit there like a lump. i'm in a state of complete disbelief and i dont want to get out of it. i just want to stay there and never have to open my eyes. ya know what i mean? i'm just not strong enough for this.