Monday, September 06, 2010

Exasperation

Its that feeling, ya know?
When the words that shouldn't be said
Blurt out.
When the thoughts that shouldn't be thought
Fumble themselves out your mouth.
Its this feeling I get after every occasion,
After every visit,
After every conversation.
And its because you're new to me.
Its because I'm new to you.
Its because I'm my own harshest critic.
Its because I feel a constant burden to be a beacon of God's love,
Whilst being sinful,
While being flawed.
While being myself and liking who I am
Yet being ashamed of how I feel
Or what I've done.
Or what I said
Or for how I made you feel
Or how I think I made you feel.
And this is all I feel
Every Time
I speak.

6 comments:

  1. Boy I'm never ashamed at who I am or what I feel. it's me and I feel you have to just be yourself. And when you are happy with yourself, everyone around you is happy :) Happy Labor Day :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. It is hard to deal with all of the complexities of being a person with so many conflicting thoughts and emotions.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You took us on a ride that moves our emotions along with you. Terrific pacing.

    ReplyDelete
  4. it is true, you are your harshest critic. try to give yourself more grace like the Father gives you. you are a beacon of God's love and a beautiful daughter of the King. remember that identity when you begin to get down on yourself. remember you are loved!

    ReplyDelete
  5. oh i forgot to add. i like you who are too. =)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks guys for all of your comments.

    ReplyDelete

I love your comments!