I don't know your faith... I can only testify on my own experiences, but I can tell you that I wish to be a beacon. A faith-filled, spirit-guided beacon of Christ love.
I found a true fullness in Spirit in Baton Rouge at my church home with Healing Place Church. And anyone who is wandering in the wilderness, suffering in the valley, for anyone who thinks that God has left him or her, for anyone who feels so sinful that the eternal love of God has excluded him, I urge desperately to check out that website. Check out the online sermons. They are wonderful and a good taste of truth.
But I'm now a THOUSAND miles away and searching.
How many of us are searching? And for what? How many feel lost? How many feel unfulfilled?
I know that I can't do it alone. I need a church community. I need role-models--cuz lemme tell ya a lil secret, cher: I AM NOT PERFECT. I AM SO SINFUL. I CAN BE A TERRIBLE PERSON AT TIMES. I AM IMPATIENT. I AM QUICK TO ANGER. I AM EASILY ANNOYED. and a million other things that I beg with the Lord to help me correct.
I want to be a better mother. I want to be a better woman. Heck I just want to be a better human being.
So what I need is a church. A need community. I need friends. I need it now.
We arrived in NC on Monday. Saturday night we attended a large, well established church. This (sunday) morning we attended Story Church and tonight we met with the Story Church Dream Team for a luau/bbq. And while they are similar in many ways; powerful in many ways, it is the energetic beginning that has drawn us to Story Church. It is the growing need for growth that has us excited to join in.
While meeting with the congregation I noticed that most of them had a common characteristic..... they were new to Christ or new to Church or they had a background in church but wandered away and came back through Story Church. Lee felt an instant connection to that newness. I, on the other hand, felt drawn by the opportunity to connect and grow. I wanted to belong to a church that was young. I feel myself drawn to serving and building deep relationships. I feel like I want to delve into Theology. I want to learn the Word and pass it on.
What does this have to do with anything?
I can only guess that now that I'm in this new place and we're kind of starting a new life, I'm reevaluating everything. I'm reevaluating what I want and expect from my life. And all these words, ideas, and desires are popping into my mind--keeping me up at night.
But Between the promise and the provision is the perfecting time. I have dreams, and God will get me there When I'm ready and am completely capable of glorifying Him once I'm there. He doesn't need my help fulfilling the promises He's made to me. I have to surrender and be patient.