Tough Love vs Spanking

- Good Argument Most people think it improper to spank children, so I have tried other methods to control my kids when they have one of 'those moments.' One that I found effective is for me to just take the child for a car ride and talk. Some say it's the vibration from the car, others say it's the time away from any distractions such as TV, Video Games, Computer, IPod, etc. Either way, my kids usually calm down and stop misbehaving after our car ride together. Eye to eye contact helps a lot too. I've included a photo below of one of my sessions with my son, in case you would like to use the technique. Sincerely, Your Friend An email my friend forwarded me! Sooo Funny! **Disclaimer: This is just a joke. Please don't try this at home, and if you do.... you didn't get it from me!***

Ages Ago

I posted this: CARNEY <---------click here to read the original post

Well now they've posted videos of themselves playing acoustic versions of their songs.  Now you can hear what I heard:

Everyday

Every day brings it own constant reminder that time is passing. I'm sure this seems obvious to everyone, but I often space out for lengths of time, when suddenly I'm aware that I'm older--much older than I want to be. I realize I'm by no means old, but as the archetype Peter Pan personality, each day propels me farther from youth. Or as Shakespeare described it once... propels me closer to second childishness "Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything." This is terrifying.

How morbid to face your own mortality... Where's the joie de vivre?

I've always had it in me-the dark, brooding side that can't let go. Always looking back, wishing to go back. But it's become worse now that I've a little one. I look at pictures taken just a mere 3 years ago... the progress, the growth, the advancement, the age. My goodness if only i could hit the pause button.

And then it happens... I space out and another six months have rolled by.

Hopefully I'll have taken enough pictures, that looking back will be so filled with snapshots that i can use it as a "My Life" flip book.

Sitting in the dark morning glow
Behaving peacefully,
Although I already know
That the worst is yet to come.
The In-laws are coming
To stifle my fun.

What a day!

I've the filthiest house in the universe. We've got Jump-n-Jive this morning with Lia's school friends for a back-to-school bonanza. I've got some baking and shopping and A TON of cleaning to do before I host a dinner party today, which I'm very excited about!(the dinner party that is... not the cleaning lol) But there doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day. I completely forgot when I scheduled dinner for Thursday that I had also confirmed playing all day at Jump-n-Jive.

Ever spread yourself thin? I think it makes it easier when you're doing things that you love/want to do. Say if today were filled with: dentist (cringe), going to Walmart (kill me), and in-laws...(just joking) it would have made it less worth the effort.

My carrot cake is on the menu:

Its Monday Again

And the weeks are passing by so quickly. The summer is nearing its end, and Lia is soon to start pre-k again. Its time to go back to a routine that I'm not sure fits us anymore. I'm the worst person in the world when it comes to change. I always like for things to remain the same and to maintain normalcy; I like for people to stick around...remain the people they always were.

But the long and short of it is that things have to change. I know how beneficial it would be for Lia to start school full time and for me to work full time.

Maybe its like a band-aid. Gotta just do it quickly and neatly.

How do people change routines so easily? Find new jobs? Buy new houses? Move to other cities? It must take a lot of courage and confidence.

Prayer in Verse (A Revisiting)

Nothing more to say.
So much typing these couple of days.
So much arguing...
Not much going my way.
Hold on to faith and pray.
I ask Mother Mary...
You too are a mommy.
Show, teach, inspire, charm me.
Reach out your arms and hold me.
But most of all love me.
I beg--Holy Spirit
Send me your graces.
Unlike King Solomon,
Don't let me fall on my faces.
Send me wisdom...
Erase all traces-
of impatience.
I implore my heavenly Father,
Help me get through times.
I know they getting harder.
Help me be a better mother, daughter, wife and lover.
You are my only hope.
Its through you that I'll be able to cope.
I beseech you Jesus.
If anyone needs you... its us.
No more words but you know what's in my heart
And I know you won't let me fall apart.
You will make me stronger.
You will help me be a mother.
You will guide me by your perfect example
And on the devil, with you by my side,
I will trample.

Birthday Blues

I have been in New Orleans since Wednesday and have eaten out (restaurants, fast food, trash) every single day!

I feel fat, disgusting, guilty, gluttonous.... and now its my birthday today, and guess what the plans are?~!!

Going out to EAT! which WILL involve appetizers, main dishes, creamy salads, desserts. I don't think a year's worth of exercises will burn off the weight that I packed on this week.

I've fallen in love

With soccer star: CRISTIANO RONALDO.

You may need to avert your eyes... it is like staring into the SUN!

For your viewing pleasure: a video of my man. Excuse the sound track because the guy who made it didn't seem to have a firm grasp on music and video editing, but the video is still PHENOMENAL!

Red Flags?

have you ever met someone that you thought was going to become a good friend and ended up being a person that you don't wanna become friends with? 

Sometimes it takes time to discover who a person is. 

Love and Marriage

Sunday Citar hosted by Fresh Mommy.

I've selected some funny quotes about love and marriage for this week's Sunday Citar because I believe that some of the best lessons can be learned through humor. It is the gift God gave us in order to survive the mundane, the painful, the boredom, the indifference, the consistencies, the predictable--I think you get the point...


I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.
-Rodney Dangerfield

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
-Rodney Dangerfield

Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think - in a deeper voice.
-Bill Cosby

The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband.
-Joan Rivers

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer. Not to love is to suffer. To suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. (from Love and Death)
-Woody Allen

An Accident

[Daughter is playing in the bath tub. It is filled with brand new toys her mother bought.  The toys are the standard random aquatic animal squirt toys... When squeezed they squirt water out]

Mother: Here baby... Look what happens when you squeeze them!

[Mother fills a toy with water and proceeds to squirt water on her daughter's cheeks and face]

Daughter: It pee-pee'd...... on my face.

HP6

Okay so I saw Harry Potter 6 last night,  and it was AMAZING.

Well I must say that the only other HP movie I saw was the first one, and I was not very impressed with it. I have, however, read all the books! So now i'm tempted to revisit not only all the books, but to watch movies 2-5 as well.

Whatta ya think?

The outcome of my trip.

I made it back from my trip after a painful 13 hours in the airport.  Altogether it was a great trip, consisting of a beautiful wedding and awesome people.

I'm so happy that I went. For a while last week I contemplated not going because of how difficult I was finding having to leave Lia. 

When I got back. It was like I had never left. No one overly excited. No one missed me terribly. They just did their thing while I was gone,  and then when i got back they did their thing with me around.  

Inattentive

"Stop coming in and out of the bath;

you're gunna get sick"

she said as she turned back around

and finished commenting on her facebook.

The little girl is singing in the bath tub

to some Disney song 

whose lyrics have been consolidated into

only 2 or 3 lines repeated without cessation. 

Finally the mother stops and listens.

Nods her head and thinks to herself,

"Is there something I should be doing right now?"

Nah. Oh look another Farm Town gift!

Back from historical downtown Saint Charles

Back at home the lights flicker
with familiar ineffeciency. Like small
eyes on a smiling face, where only
tiny glimpses of glass catch the light
before it's unceremoniosly squinted closed.

After a long holiday away from normality,
one tends to forget how important everyone is
and how competent they all are
even when you're not around.
Puts you back in your place.

I've seen the world through airplane windows--
more glare than scenery. The mind oddly focused
on overlooking your own reflection in the plastic-glass;
Carrying a book to show the travelers that you
are indeed literate, while still from Louisiana.


You remember all your prayers while on a plane:
The forgive-me's, the please-give-me's, the I-promise-
I-Will-give-thee's.... Just get me off this God forsaken
metal, flying, abomination safetly's... Then I say to myself,
"remember Moses... tapping twice... no faith... best be confident!"

At home you remember why the hell you left.
All the while thinking, "Man I know I have a half read book lying
around here somewhere!" Just let my mind escape.
No need to be rash and propel yourself a thousand miles away.
Just lay yourself down. Close your eyes and think.

Then tap tap tap,
Just like that.
you've written yourself
a little rap.

Pride

Translation: Honduras is a role model for the rest of the world. We don't have petroleum or dollars, but we have BALLS!

The Cootie Mama dancing along with Elmo

1:45 is hilarious! and at 1:47 she just pops back up! She kills me, hahha

Late night babbling... It happens!

Listless dreams

In restless sleep,

Of grey fluid streams

With no life to upkeep.

Cold empty water--

It neither crashes or flows,

In an endless shudder

As I sink farther below.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the same dark pitch ocean where the Kraken lies asleep, swims Moby Dick, the great white whale, harvesting lives within the deep. "As unchanging as the sea," she sings, as the Phantom listens below, and an incessant tremor ripples, unforgivingly, about my soul.

Too nervous to write

I've been stressing over a trip to St. Louis that I'm taking this Friday. 

I can't sleep at night!

I'm worried about the airline. I'm worried that I'll do something wrong and they're going to throw away all my stuff. I'm sad that I can't take my daughter with me. I'm upset that I'll spend so much time away from her. 

Praying for peace in my heart, peace in my mind, peace in the Middle East, and peace in the New Orleans East!

JM

What the hey?! I'll give it a shot!

I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:14

I will give everything to Jesus. When I have nothing to give, I'll give Him this nothing. ~St. Therese~

"Preach the Gospel at all times, when necessary use words." - St. Francis of Assisi

"When we are whom we are called to be we will set the world ABLAZE!"- St. Catherine of Siena

I have a friend-- well more like a friendly acquaintance, and it's truly my loss that we aren't closer. We went to high school together ( i think she was many years younger), and we ended up going to the same college... and those quotes are off her Facebook. This young lady is so filled with the Holy Spirit that you feel renewed in faith just by being her presence. Every time I need inspiration, I visit her page. She's a photographer, and she seems to have the ability to capture the beauty/goodness/soul of everything she shoots.  Her quotes lift me up. So I hope that these quotes lift you up today... even if you didn't need a lift--it can't hurt :)

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!

All day i've been trying to upload a photo for photo friday but every time I try my browser crashes!! So instead I'm going to share a joke and a video... make it a Funny Friday!

Can never go wrong with a boudreaux and thibodeaux joke!!

 
Boudreaux and his wife Clotille lived on a little farm outside Mamou. One day Clotille said, "Mais,
Boudreaux, you have to get rid of dat dog. All he does is lie under de front porch and turn over da trash cans."

Boudreaux said, "Okay. Cher. I'll get rid of him." He put him in the pickup, drove down the road a
couple of miles and dumped him out. He drove home and in a few minutes the dog showed up!

 So he put him back in the truck, drove several more miles and dumped him out. After getting back home, the dog showed up again. Clotille said, "You have to take him out and drive around and around a lot in circles, den dump him out. Dat way he won't know da way home."

Boudreaux said, "You some smart, Clotille, and dat's why I marry you."

Boudreaux took the dog, drove all around and zigzagged a lot then dumped the dog out.

He started back home but soon pulled over and parked and called Clotille on his cell phone. "Has dat dog come back yet?"

 Clotille answered "Yes, he just came in."

Boudreaux said, "Well, put him up to da phone -  I'm lost." 

The best version of Total Eclipse of the Heart ever!! Thank Bryan the Beautiful for discovering this and sharing it with me!!  (you may want to make it full screen to be able to read the captions! they're priceless!)

    

Tongue Tied

When the words

Are all dried

I look toward you

For words to rhyme. 

Unlikely chances 

And unusual themes

In your hands

I leave the keys

To my writing

And borrowed style-- 

This happens

Every once in a while.

After its all said and done

That's when the fun

Has finally begun.

Overflowing with creative juices--

My sacrifice to the writing muses:

Endless sighs,

And awkward staring,

Half closed eyes,

And music blaring, 

Unfinished lines

That are not worth sharing.

Best of my Best

See Alex at Please Try Again!
Feel free to join in!!! Take it to your own blog, see what your followers have to say :)


Best death scene EVER: Romeo and Juliet the Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes verson. It was so simple and perfect

Best Farewell Scene: The Nightmare Before Christmas when Jack is leaving to spread Christmas to the human world.


Best Revenge Scene: The Princess Bride's Inigo Montoya: "My name is Inigo Montoya. You have killed my father. Prepare to die." I agree with Alex. The princess Bride is my favorite movie so it must make my list

Top Tear Jerker: Titatnic. It was unbearable. Although I did leave in the middle of I Am Sam because I was crying so hard. So its a tie.


Unbelievable Ending: At the end of Grease when Danny and Sandy are in Grease Lightening and then all of a sudden the car takes flight... i don't believe it :)

Best "I Didn't See That One Coming" Scene: The Sixth Sense when we find out Bruce Willis is really (you know)!!! I totally didn't see it coming!

Saddest Romance: Philidelphia: Tom Hanks and Antonio Banderas. One dying of AIDS, the other struggling to hold on and both living in a world that doesn't accept them. Sad.

Best Hand Holding Scene: In Pursuit of Happiness, Will Smith with his son as they look for a place to stay the night.

Movie Most Quoted in Chat Room Conversations: Space Balls, "I see your swartz is as big as mine" ??? couldn't think of anything.

and one for the road:

Best Hospital Scene: Talladega Nights, Ricky Bobby when he's pretending to be in a coma and his friend comes in to take him out of his misery! LOL

Tell a joke tuesday

Hosted by: Wayne at Wayne's Window to the World


My cousin sent me this joke in an email:


Johnny's Mother looked out the window and noticed him "playing church" with their cat. He had the cat sitting quietly, and he was preaching to it.
She smiled and went about her work.
A while later she heard loud meowing and hissing and ran back to the open window to see Johnny baptizing the cat in a tub of water.
She called out, "Johnny, stop that! The cat is afraid of water!"
Johnny looked up at her and said,
"He should have thought about that before he joined my church."

Just a lil' something

Friendship

There are very few consistent friendships in my life.  People whom I thought were there for the long haul have left me high and dry, and others whom I believed to be just strange specks of conversation dusted on my life have engrained themselves into my heart.  

This weekend was supposed to be a friend weekend.  I went down to New Orleans to connect with one friend and instead I reconnected with another.  

Friendship is a two way street, right? But has there ever been a friend in your life that you wanted to maintain more than he or she was willing to maintain you?  In my life there has always been the friend that I've had to chase around--the friend that I loved more than I was loved. Sometimes it takes me only a short bit to realize this and to drop them, and with others it takes me much longer to realize.  

And once dropped, there was a 0% reconnection history... until now.  I hung out Saturday with an old dear friend of mine that, as of a few months ago, I thought was lost forever.  We were best friends, and when I lost his friendship I felt lost in the world.  A lot was going on and the only steady person I had wouldn't return my phone calls, stopped talking to me, and all together left me. 

But chilling this weekend brought back the same tranquility and comfort that it had 4 and a half years ago.  We will never be what we were, but at least I know he's there.  He's allowed to exist in my world again and I guess I'm there in his too.  

Flip the coin... Another friend(?), who is not at all a friend--not even an associate. Instead this person is an opportunist and all around a selfish person, whom I've resolved to drop. I'm ready now. It was SUCH a long time coming, but I'm ready now to call it quits on trying to pick up pieces. 

Feels peaceful and frustrating at the same time, but it must be done. 

Photo Friday

Lia got a princess tricycle for Christmas, and it has all but decayed and turned to dust in the backyard. On the rare occasion she condescends to sit on it, I jump all over her trying to teach her how to move her legs. But like all annoyingly overbearing mothers, I repel her! So here is a rare snapshot of Lia on her bike :)


Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

How much of you is there in here?

I like to write. I've been writing my whole life. Since I was a silly little kid, I would keep a diary that was part poem, part song, and mostly nonsense. But I am not a story teller. Poetry is my medium. I'm not saying I'm any good but everything I write is personally connected to me. While I am capable of writing about things that I haven't experienced, they are things that I can empathize with or feel deeply about. And the way that I portray them in my writing is the way I see them.

Now here's my question... A novelist or story teller: How much of them is in their writing? I'm currently reading a really perverse novel, by a well-known actor, and I wonder where he thought this stuff up? Is it inside of him? Is that why he felt he needed to express it in this story? Authors who write very violent novels, are they themselves harboring a very violent person deep within, who is placated by the telling of violent stories? I would imagine that if I were to write a novel, it would contain my perspective, my feelings... even if those were forced feelings conjured up from deep within.

Does anyone have any insight on this that they could share with me?

FRUSTRATION!!!!!!!!!!

The other day I spent a little time clicking through blogs. I read one post, clicked on comments, then went on over to visit the pages of other commenters.

WELL! i found one blog that I just loved. I loved her writing style, grace, topics, humor, but for some reason I didn't save the link or subscribe to her rss feed.

I've been spending a small eternity looking for this blog again. Trying to retrace my steps. Even googling key phrases with NO success.

Its appears to be forever lost in the blogosphere.

Tell a Joke Tuesday

with lsu down by 4 in the 9th inning its pretty damn difficult to be funny, but I need a distraction!

Hosted by: Wayne's Window to the World

Little bit of Baseball Humor!

It just so happens....

that as a citizen of the lovely state of Louisiana, one can never get too comfortable when it comes to winning. 

when rooting for the Saints, you PRAY, you BEG, you YELL, you CURSE!  you usually LOSE! but you feel it. Its always a close game. You always think this will be the big win!  And then they let you down. Beat you down to the freaking ground.

When rooting for LSU, you CHEER, you GESTICULATE, you BRAG! you usually WIN!, but only after a gut wrenchingly close finish... its never easy.  At one point you think you've got it in the bag; at another you think you're gunna be sick.  

ARG! Why do they do this to me!!???

Tonight is a great night, though.  LSU beat Texas.  Game 1 out of 3 is OURS!  GEAUX Tigers!

Random Post Redux-Housing Search

 Thank you Kel for Random Post Redux!  Each Saturday she gives you the opportunity to post a "previously used post." 

Looking back at my old posts is kind of horrifying. Posts that I once thought were genius, after a few years aren't so impressive. 

Anyway, here's a post of mine from May of 2006. Enjoy!

Housing Search

Trying to find and buy a house is like trying to kiss a racoon. You know its going to be hard but not impossible...

It turns out to be a living hell and you end up with stiches on your lips. Well I'm going to have stiches in my butt when they stick it to me with the mortgage and the realtor.

Every aspect of it sucks. You're constantly double guessing yourself, and you always wait out to see if anything better comes but it only gets worse and you feel you missed out.

At this point I feel like I've been searching FOREVER and I'm never going to find anything, and if I do find something its going to be a 150,000 dollar 2 story dorito bag under the expressway!

I'm getting desperate.

Funny Friday

Kel at The Hesitant Housewife is hosting Funny Friday! Here's my attempt at humor :)

Funny Video:

Sarah Silverman's got a great Secret!

Rock of Love on SNL

Quotes of Late

Jasmine: Now if only he were a vampire! He'd be perfect.

Jillien: We should start a band?? Who would play the damn instruments?!

Jessica: How's that for TMZ?!!

Melissa [in a text]: You guys have got to hurry-- the guitarist wearing all red [one piece jumpsuit] is sooOooO cute!

Grandma! What large ears you have!

The better to hear you with, my dear- replies the cunning wolf dressed as an elderly woman he had, only moments before, gobbled up like Grandma Pot Pie.


Now I present music, for your ears, that I've only just heard for the first time over the weekend and have consequently fallen deeply in-love with it all.

First a band on the RISE!: Carney

Walking into the House of Blues in downtown New Orleans, I'm taken aback by a sound. What sound?! You may be asking yourself. Well let me just tell you, it was the sound of Reeve Carney belting out his eerily hypnotizing melodies into the dim but unusually clear atmosphere of one of New Orleans's most diverse venues. On this very stage stood (well more like gyrated) Lady Gaga; where Rachel Vette and her band of brothers rocked out with their socks out- straight from the west bank for our viewing and hearing pleasure. Although all these thoughts may not have surfaced to the front of my consciousness, I was aware that this sound was joining the likes of my favorites. This voice was going to stay with me forever. All this before I ever saw their faces. Even before I watched them sway from side to side, pulled by the release of some inner energy- an aural soul...

Not only is their sound so incredibly a 60's, acid trip, take-a-chill-pill, extravaganza of harmonics-to top it all off: They are all GORGEOUS! Lead by 2 brothers Reeve and Zane Carney. This family's got it all. Check em out!! They're on tour now with The Veronica's. Honestly if given the opportunity I would see them again.


Next is Flow Tribe: a rare acoustic performance that left me speechless.

Always about you

How can I go to that place
That place where all was well
And all was fine
And all was clear
and well defined?
Where once there was just you and me,
There's only thoughts of
What we used to be.
So many hurts and silent fights
Too many times I find
Its my will against your might.
Apologies that forever fall flat
Crushed by your need to be always right.
A constant pointing of the finger
And our anger always seems to linger
Even when we appear to be okay
Below the surface there's nothing but
Shade-
Shadowy surfaces hiding the pain
Of little offenses that can't go away.

Random Post Redux

Okay so every Saturday Kel over at Hesitant Housewife is hosting Random Post Redux, where you repost one of your old posts. I had the MOST BUSY weekend of my life, so I didn't participate. BUT fortunately my home slice over at Please Try Again did and you must check out Kel's post as well. Its TO DIE FOR :)

There is nothing more fun than playing tag, and Alex over at Please Try Again has tagged me. Here's the great concept:

~Open your first photo folder
~Scroll down to the 10th photo
~Post that photo and story on your blog
~Tag five friends to do the same.


My story begins as most stories do- at the beginning. My daughter Lia is probably the most girlie girl ever born. In her two short years of living she has grown to love princesses, make-up, high heels, Hannah Montana, dancing, singing etc... I am the mother of a 2 year old tween. Its not rare for us to hear the distinct Clack Clack Clack of Lia walking around the hardwood floor in a pair of mismatched heels. She's actually gotten pretty darn good and walking in them and perhaps has a future in the modeling industry. Lets just hope that she ventures out into modeling after she's graduated from Oxford with a degree in biochemical engineering, won a Nobel prize for discovering a new planet and has gotten a gold medal in swimming at the Olympics, of course. (by the way the book she's holding is called Garden Spells.... EXCELLENT!)

Here's where I tag 5 people, but I don't know 5 people. So I'll just tag one and hope she can keep the love alive:

Amy at Amy's Blogspot

Just so you know

Remember that time I ran away?

Nothing inside me to make me stay.
Not because I wanted to leave
A feat my heart could never achieve.

Till now I think of that very day--

All because of the words I couldn't say.

Or better yet the words you refused to hear
Out of indifference, discomfort, anger-- maybe fear?

Still I moved steadily farther

And part of you I remained no longer.

A stranger of the most awkward kind

Because of secrets that are no longer just mine.

Tell a joke tuesday

A man walks into a psychologist office wearing nothing but a see-thru shower curtain.. The psychologist turns to the man and after a moment's evaluation, he says: "I can clearly see your nuts."

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.- Rita Mae Brown

Unless all you remember are the bad things.

I have the craziest memory. I barely remember things about my childhood. I'll sit and chat with my family or with childhood friends and they'll bring up old stories, but I have not even a faint recollection of it. "How could you NOT remember that, Jillien!?" they ask.

I just don't.

But I do remember when a girl in math class yelled at me and tried to embarrass me in front of all my friends. I remember the fights, the injustices, the little hurts that seemed to have only been scabbed over and never healed.

I wonder if that's just the type of person I am.

Newest Raisin' Canes Chicken Fingers Slogan:

"Rice Owls taste like chicken!"

Yay go LSU!

Now to get it straightened out... I did not graduate from LSU.  I just happened to marry an LSU alum and live in LSU country and be born in LOUISIANA, which automatically makes me a huge Saints fan, LSU fan, and supporter of all teams in the SEC :)

Lia's my slice of perfect pie.

The early summer Sun is dangling from a string one foot above my head. the beads of sweat race down the back of my neck seeking shade under my t-shirt. Think cold thoughts. You're walking on the frozen plains of the north pole. The freezing winds are burning the skin on your face. Fresh crispy air fill and sting your lungs. And instead of pushing a stroller you are pulling a heavy wooden sled, where all of your life's possessions rest softly and enjoy the free ride. Splash. The sound of water and children's laughter break me from my dream. The children, newly freed from their academia and social hierarchies, are swimming in pools in their big back yards. Protected by tall wooden fences- pale yellow fences that still smell faintly of Home Depot. My yard is small. And my daughter has no pool. And my fence is made of old, brown boards we took off of the former fence when ol' Gustav decided to blow it down. I'm just trying to get to fun. I just want to take my daughter to music class and watch her dance and sing-watch her love me and show her I love her. Instead its ungodly hot. Instead of singing, she's sweating. And instead of dancing, she's sitting in a stroller. But we do make it. I watch her smile and play and run. She went along for the ride without a single cry or whine. She thought nothing of the strangeness of not traveling in her familiar car seat, or if she did think about it, at least she had the decency not to comment. Not once did she mention the heat or the bumps or the bright sun. She was perfect. God gave me a slice of perfect.

Its the summer

and i'm left feeling desperate.  Maybe I'm still so fresh out of  school that I feel the year doesn't start in january and end in December.  Instead MY year begins in August and ends in July.  The final 2 months of my year are the hottest and the ones with the most time to think, reflect, regret, reckon.  

They say the first 3 years of a child's life are the most important. My little one happens to be turning 3 in the fall.  Right in the beginning of my year. And like a person with a New Year's Resolution who finds herself mid october with the same dead-end job and 5 extra pounds on her already rump bodice, I'm kicking it into high gear these last few months.

I'm not as patient as I should be. I'm not as attentive as I need to be. I want to be a great mother. More than I want to be anything other than being myself, I want that. 

ITs officially friday morning,

and my mind is resisting all signals from my body that it's exhausted. My Mind is preparing my body for REAL exhaustion when we wake up at 7 AM tomorrow morning to take care of a 2 and a half year old for the entire day into the evening and on to eternity-it feels sometimes.

• It seems there's not enough hours in the day to allow me to do or to get what I need. I guess that's why I'm up for most of the night. Because I require more than food and water. I need space, relaxation, alone time, love, laughter, kisses, silence, but mostly a good book.

• I've got a good man. He works hard. He loves his family. He comes home and relieves me from motherhood for a few hours, while I go upstairs and he plays with the baby. All he asks for is a clean house and a happy child.

• I'm steadily approaching the end of Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. It's the book of Revelation with a bit of Paradise Lost, Mission Impossible, and Gilligan's Island.

And there ya have it, my brief synopsis of the Life of Jillien

What's making me laugh: gotta eat edition

This is a modern classic!

This one's just plain classic!

via videosift.com

Unwelcomed Visitor

Lee: Kills on Contact?!?!?! My ass! This son of a bitch is dancing around like he's in a parade!

Way too late

I am not sorry about you.
Could never apologize for
Loving you.
Could never vocalize
What it meant to do
The things we knew we shouldn't do.
How could I take back the thoughts
And forget the lessons
Your friendship taught.
Am where I am and who I am
By doing things I shouldn't ought.
No way will I
Reign back my feelings
Each a favorite of mine--
Given to me by you.
So quickly the time flew!
And now it seems that its all done
But seared in me are all the fun
And silent times that we shared
While time on our memories
Will slowly wear.

Quotes of Late

Bueno: "Boo... you guys are lame! I'm totally drunk."

Mike: "F*cking Matthew LeBlanc" (with a hard c at the end)

Jillien: "I'm sorry but your vagina has totally turned me off."

Lee: "No More Reading! You're going crazy"

Books that are coming out this fall/winter....

and I'm desperate for them!

Book 10 of the Southern Vampire Mysteries:

The last installment of the Codex Alera

Book 4 of the Vampire Academy Series

Finally the fourth book of the Luxe Series called Splendor, which no cover has been released! grr

A little segment I like to call: Way too much information

The underwear I'm wearing is HORRIBLY uncomfortable and feels like its purpose is to slowly saw me in half from the bottom up!

I'm realizing that I'm not patient enough to potty train Lia.  Its terribly disheartening, and I don't know what method will be effective for her and bearable to me.

Its becoming overwhelmingly clear that I'm incapable of maintaining a clean house. Either its a genetically inherited trait or I'm just completely incompetent.  Possibly both.

The turn out!

There we are!  It was so much fun. 

This is the day

This is the day
That the LORD has made.
We will rejoice
And be glad in it!


This was an echo song (and of course bible passage) that we would sing in grade school. I went to one of those Pre-K through 8th grade schools. A catholic school run by nuns. And the place where I found the most important and beloved of my friends.

well TODAY is the Day! of my 10 year 8th grade reunion. All 6 months of planning have lead up to this point and we'll see tonight, if all my hard work has paid off. I sure hope everything goes off without a hitch. I'm scared that the space is too small. I'm scared there won't be enough food. I'm scared everyone will be awkward and quiet. BUT I tried my best, and anything that comes my way will have to be dealt with accordingly.

It takes a minute...

It takes a minute
To realize you're there.
Years have passed
And Time has cast
A reality tint amid the air.

But there were times
Happy times
Young and in-love

That seeing you has
reminded me of.

I have GOT to clean my house

my beautiful cousin is coming up to BR today to spend a couple of days with me before her college graduation this weekend, which happens to fall on the same weekend of my 10 year 8th grade reunion! YIKES.

Anyways, my house.... is .... FILTHY, and I .....am....blogging!

And in my procrastination, I have written a horribly pathetic excuse for a poem, which I'm just going to let linger as a draft for eternity.  

But more successfully, I came across this IMMENSELY hilarious blog: www.shucknjive.blogspot.com.  

CHeck out this post of his from 2007:--->clickme!<----

One Act/ One Scene Play: Always Reading!

[Wife is sitting on the couch in a dimly lit family room. One lamp is all the light she has to read her book. Moments pass after which Husband walks into the room and turns on the television]

Wife: Okay you can watch tv, but try to keep it down because I'm trying to read my book.

[Husband doesn't say anything, but he acknowledges her request with a nod and acquiesces. After a while the pictures on the television screen start to catch Wife's attention ,and she begins paying more attention to the tv than her book... When all of a sudden a commercial comes on... ]

Wife: Oh my god! hahaha I love that guy!

Wife: He's hosting the MTV Movie Awards?!?!

Wife: He's so funny! I love him! Adam Sandberg...

Wife: Oh wait! His name is ANDY Sandberg.

Wife: Why did I call him Adam??

Wife: [turns to husband] OK! Let me read my book!

[Husband gives her a look of surprise mixed with disgust.]

The end!

WHYYYY?!?!?!?!!!

Why on EARTH am I still awake!?

GRRR How the hell!!!?

how the hell did a freaking diaper get into the washing machine?!!?!?!?!!?

How do I clean up a diaper explosion from my washer AND dryer!?

unbelievable!

Disney on Ice

Fact: I love disney movies, shows, music, characters, stars.... the works.

As a child, like MOST children, I develop

ed a profound love for all things Disney.  I watched/rented/owned every movie (most of which I still have on VHS and now on DVD).  WELL, I never grew out of it.  I enjoy watching the Disney Channel with my daughter... I LOVE watching the movies, but I must admit the older movies are SO much better than the new ones.  The older ones were didactic. The new ones are all comedies and shallow. Anyways, tell me why last week we went to see Disney on Ice with my cousin Jessi and my mother in law.  Lia knew Mickey and Minnie because she watches Mickey Mouse Club House in the mornings but the rest of the movie characters were foreign to

 her, such as Lion King, Lilo and Stich, Peter Pan.  BUT I knew every song... every thing! and I think I enjoyed myself more than most of the children in the arena.  

Needless to say, we're going AGAIN! and I know it'll be just as fun for me, but maybe more fun for Lia- now that she'll be acquainted with them. P

lus, I've been showing her the movies all week so she can get to know the characters better. This time will be wonderful!

 

Makes you think

So incredibly sad. Of course David Cook's not the only person in America or the world even that has lost someone due to this disease, THAT'S what makes it even sadder. Its for everone who loves and loses.

Not me monday- running kind of late

While parked in the lot at the YMCA, rushing and running late to boot camp, noticing that my daughter still had her breakfast all over her face, I certainly did not use a diaper to wipe her face clean because I had forgotten to pack wipes.

I absolutely would never get totally obsessed with finishing "Club Dead." So as a result, I did not drive all over baton rouge running errands with my book in my left hand-reading the occasional sentence here or there during driving pauses. That would just be plain crazy.


As a perfectly well groomed American female, I did not go almost a month without shaving my legs. So today when my workout pants showed the bottom 6 inches of my legs...i surely did not take out a disposable razor and shave ONLY the bottom 6 inches of my legs.... that would have been abominable.

I've never been lazier in all my life!

AAH I feel like doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, but eat and read.


Post Script: I've revisiting the Sookie Stackhouse books and have found that I like them more and more as the series goes on.

i LOVE it

I follow this artist, Jake at Manuscript 72<----click me Some of his stuff is really dark, some playful, but ALL of it is really special and unique and specifically his. A few of my favorites:

perhaps-a-machine

the-creature-lives

maybe+an+astronaut

Babbling: No Use Reading

Kind of cold sitting here.
The synthetic breeze,
Blowing in evenly timed intervals,
Is giving me goosebumps.
Familiar sounds
Undulating in the air:
Gargle
Hum
Click Click Click
The running water
Scorching hot on my tongue
When I'm just trying to rinse
My spearmint mouth out.
What an unnecessarily intense experience.
Long day
With nothing to say
All my books are finished
And none in the reserve.
I should be more prepared
For times just as this.

*******************************************
My eyes are tired of this large blinking screen.
Nothing but electronic pictures to be seen.
Electronic words
And Electronic Sounds.
Electronic people
and Electronic battle grounds.
Electronic lovers
and Electronic friends
Electronic minds
at an electronic end.

The absolute craziest

What i have heard/read this week:

5) The janitor at the mall calling his friend on his cell phone asking about car insurance: "What's that insurance guy?? Direct General? Or THE General?? Ya know, the 5 star general and all that shit?!!"

4) Jack Bayles(newhat) I follow him on twitter: "swine flu scaremongering on the news says one sneeze could infect 150 people. thats 1200 victims per orgasm. some say 'bring back aids'."

3) Me while inebriated beyond coherence: "Lee fell in love with me because I talk more sober drunk than when I'm sober."

2) Guy on Radio asked about how one contracts swine flu: "You get it by oral sex. It came from birds originally... People having sex with birds and eating contaminated meat.... (Why would they call it Swine flu if its from birds?) OOHH I thought it was SWAN flu."

1) This less funny than absolutely HORRENDOUS. It highlights to me my biggest fear about mixed families. I'm always worried: say lee and I don't work out (God forbid) I KNOW no one else would love our daughter like WE do. Here's the story: My next door neighbor's daughter is pregnant. She is also married to a man who has a little boy [let's call the boy Richie] from a previous relationship. Here's the quote: "See Richie's gunna grow up to be a completely worthless human being. I hate to say that about my step son, but its true. He's too timid."

How DARE she!!! I'm telling you if I were that boy's mother and I heard something like that about MY baby, it would be ON LIKE DONKEY KONG! How terrifying that that woman is this poor boy's stepmother! Oh my! I overheard her saying it while she was outside in the garden (our backyards are adjacent to each other's). SO yeah... there ya go. Some people out there are just DAMN CRAZY.

Had to search for it.....

Tell a Joke Tuesday: Wayne's Window to the World:
A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her. 

Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket toward the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back. 

'Oh my, I am so sorry,' the woman says as she pops her eye back in place. 

'Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you,' she says. 

They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theatre followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens. 

After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for breakfast in the morning. They had a wonderful, wonderful time. 

The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed. Everything had been SO incredible! 'You know,' he said, 'you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?' 

'No,' she replies. . .  'You just happened to catch my eye.' 

My daughter LOVES

this strange yellow person!!  Gustafer Yellowgold! Especially, of course, his music videos: Getting in a Treetop and Butter Pond Lake.    SHE discovered him on Yahoo! Music, and I'm telling you she'll click on the videos like a dozen times!   Interested to know who I'm talking about???  ----------->CLICK HERE!<----------

I've been tagged!!

Alex the Girl has tagged me!  I must reveal myself to you in 13 short and interesting bullets.

1.  I really relate to Edna Pontellier's character in The Awakening.  I especially understand her quote: "I would give up the unessential; I would give my money, I would give my life for my children; but I wouldn't give myself. I can't make it more clear;"  

-not sure if that's a good thing considering the end of the book, but even before I had a family, I understood the type of woman she was.... (I can't find the right words; I just feel it)

2. I feel guilty after eating at almost every meal (but that's probably because I eat the nastiest foods)

3.  You can discover all of me through my writing, especially my poetry. I know it seems like jibberish, but to me it is like i'm opening and revealing it all.

4.  I believe my biggest flaw is that I'm contradictory. If I don't agree with you, I seem to have no self control over my ability to keep my mouth shut. It could even be as petty as:

Person #1: I love this song!
Jillien: Really?!?!? I freaking hate it!

5. I read a book a day. sometimes I'll take a couple of days off, but I start right back up again. My husband hates it. 

6. I never watch TV! all because of #5. 

7. Because I don't watch TV (#6) and all i read are novels, I have no idea what's going on in the world or in the news. I had no idea that hurricane Gustav was coming until 2 days before when my in-laws were begging Lee and I to go to Tenn with them. WHAT?! a Hurricane's a'coming?!!

8. I'm ridiculously competitive. I hate to lose, and I strive to BE the best always. (never to try my best... My best should be the best. It makes for a lot of disappointments lol)

9.  I get overly infatuated with celebrities that I find good looking.  ie. Russell Brand, Georges St. Pierre, Robert Pattinson, Zac Efron, Paul Walker.  It is soooOOOooOOOOooO Sad!  I need to talk to a specialist or something.

10. The thing that first attracted me to Lee was his smile! 

11.  Growing up I always thought that I would do a play or have a performance of some kind and get discovered by some big time agent... I would spend the rest of my life performing on Broadway!   But I'm a crummy actress.

12. I've just recently read my first fantasy genre novels and COMPLETELY fell in-love! It totally opened a new realm of books for me! (Jim Butcher's Codex Alera series)

13.  I CANNOT watch violence in any way.  Those shows about when people get in accidents on skateboards or some crazy ass stunt is like TORTURE.  Even movies that are violent will cause me to have an anxiety attack.  I'm too empathetic.   On the other hand, anything sensual,sexual, erotic (NOT vulgar) intrigues me (usually in literature).  I don't get embarrassed or get turned off by PDA's.  Its weird to explain.

Well there ya go. 13 random facts about Me.... The Infamous!  

Meeting Trace Cyrus

The first one is of Trace and I. The second is of Jessi and Trace. She was soooo pumped! I promised pictures!

What's making me laugh?

I LOVE The first 1:05 minutes !!!! It kills me!